Farewell Mike Bloomberg

On Wednesday, March 4, 2020, at 11:20 AM, former New York City Mike Bloomberg officially dropped out of the 2020 Presidential race and endorsed Joe Biden.

Mike was in the race for 101 days. I can’t help but wonder if he planned his campaign launch so day 100 would fall on Super Tuesday.

Regardless, he sent 79 emails to my non-donor account and 24 emails to my donor account in those 101 days, or 0.78 emails every day.

And yes, I said donor account. I bought some Mike buttons when he made it to the debate stage. It hurt my soul.

Oh wow.

Because Mike didn’t send very many emails, anomalies in the cycle stood out much more. The first debate Mike appeared in was on a Wednesday, and he over-hyped it before crashing. His last debate was on a Tuesday, and he didn’t over-hype it that time, but he did talk it up quite heavily after the event… on Wednesday. The two debate performances led to a huge spike in emails on Wednesday.

Mike also liked his end-of week emails, alerting me on Friday and Saturday to his campaign events. Most of what he did was arranging volunteer events for weekends, so it made sense that the bulk of his correspondence happened on those days.


Mike was odd in that the bulk of his emails arrived after 5:00 PM. Most candidates email during the day, between 11:00 AM and 4:59 PM, but Mike preferred the evening hours. This was only partly due to his surge of debate emails.

No fundraising at all.

As you can see, not many of Mike’s emails actually were about the debate. He mostly focused on events he was holding across the country where I could volunteer, or ways I could tell him how awesome he was.

No donation asks.

Mike was the only candidate who never asked me for money, which was good, because at a net worth of over fifty billion, he certainly didn’t need it. However, he made it very clear that what he wanted was praise, with many of his messages encouraging me to tell him why I thought he was the best or to share that message with my social networks. He very rarely advertised his own merch, and instead preferred to push out his message as much as possible (or get me to push it out for him).

Mike’s emails never really stood out. They didn’t fall into the standard rhetorical tropes of political emails, but they also didn’t shine with their own soul. He started with quite a bit of a struggle just figuring out what to call me–his first few emails literally just called me “supporter” before he tried “team” and “friend” and settled on not really naming me at all.

Mike’s primary focus was on beating Trump, but by the end, he was also frowning at Bernie Sanders. His four emails that were negative toward the Democratic party were all about how Sanders couldn’t beat Trump.

In the end, Mike ran on the campaign slogan “Mike will get it done,” and he ultimately… didn’t really get it done. He ended his race by changing the definition of “it” from “becoming President” to “defeating Donald Trump.” Though really, in the end, wasn’t that it all along?

Bloomberg, woo-oo! by that Discord guy

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